I wouldn't say I've been missing it.

I'm much more awake today. I didn't have to rely on coffee this morning to get anything started. It's nice to wake up and see sunlight, even if it's deceptively cold out today. My alarm starts going off at 7:00 and I hit snooze until 7:30 or so. I really don't need to get up that early unless I shower in the morning, but I guess I just don't like to feel rushed first thing in the morning. The drive to work took a little longer this morning and it felt weird not getting here at least ten minutes early. I'm freakishly compulsive like that. I have to be early for everything, no matter what. If I'm even remotely late I get all flustered and the rest of my day is screwed. I'm not sure why I'm that way.

I'm also a freak about getting separated from the person or group I'm with. I have this horrible fear of abandonment. Then I start to worry if I'm being clingy. It's frustrating and I'm sure I act very unnatural in public situations. Add that with the fact that I can't stand large, slow-moving crowds and I'm a big freaking mess.

You know that part in Office Space where he's talking to the Bobs and says that when he gets to work he does nothing and just stares at his desk for about an hour? I'm going to have to learn how to do that. I'm doing a lot of running from desk to desk and asking, "Do you have anything for me?" I don't have a lot of stuff at my desk so there's only so much rearranging I can do. I want to work, but I'm not good at looking busy when there's nothing to do. The other problem is that the "phone lady" is on vacation until last week. There's a bunch of stuff that I could be doing, but require a phone at my desk.